So, there are a few things we usually stick fast to. One is keeping Christmas simple. We do not participate in Black Friday shopping. We have always told the girls that Santa is make believe, and they only get one gift from us (though usually make out really well because our families are so large). I love saying that my girls know more about Saint Nicholas and Saint Basil than the legend of Santa. We do mostly handmade items for our family for the holidays. It just feels better, and the girls LOVE picking out what they made for what family members. For us to, it means more to get a tub of cookies or a special recipe than stuff from Walmart.
That being said, last night Kevin and our brother in law Dave announced yesterday that they are going to Best Buy. At midnight. To wait in line to be there at opening to get a doorbuster deal. This floored me, because Kevin, well, my husband is not a spender. We get most of our furniture from Craigslist and thrift stores. When we do need a big item like electronics or appliances, he will spend months researching what he wants and figuring out when and where to get the best price. We will spend almost every weekend hitting all the stores near us, just to see what they had in their scratch and dent sections.
Apparently, one of the doorbuster deals was a TV. The TV he has wanted for a while. Up until this morning, we were using a 20 inch computer monitor as a TV. Hey, it worked. Sure, Kevin missed having his gaming monitor at his desk, but we needed something. This set up has been working for us for about a year now. Kevin would often talk about buying something else, so he could get his monitor back and watch his shows on a TV you didn't need a magnifying glass to see from the couch. So, off Kevin went with Dave at 11 last night, to sit for HOURS in the freezing rain, to get their item tickets for what they wanted at 3 am, then for the doors to open at 5 am. Kev said there was at least 100 people in line by the time 5 rolled around. It took them until 7am to finish checking out. To me, that is insane.
Apparently, for the make and model of TV, they saved almost 40%. Saving that percentage on something he wanted made Kevin really happy. He came home with the grin of a 12 year old boy who got his red rider bb gun for Christmas. He set it up immediately, smiling the whole time.
Now that the cardinal rule of no shopping on black friday was broken, I just hope he doesn't see the TV advertised for less later. That, and I hope both the boys get over whatever illness they now have from sitting out in the freezing rain for hours. They both just woke up with sniffles and coughs, took dayquil and are sitting on the couch under a blanket, watching the new big TV with grins on their faces....
Friday, November 26, 2010
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Thankful!
Sew... I have been out of sorts for a while, it seems I want to nap at every possible moment instead of sew or blog! I did manage to finish a quilt for a friend's birthday, simple and quick in batiks
The other reason I have been out of sorts is all the running around! The girls have had a lot going on at their schools, we are getting ready for Kevin's family coming over this Thanksgiving, Evie is practicing like a mad woman for her piano recital, Rena has tae kwon do, it just seems we never stop!
Rena's school had a Thanksgiving Play last week, which was absolutely adorable! She also did a trike a thon for St. Jude's Hospital.
In this photo Rena is in the front corner, first row! She had a blast.
I owe a lot of gratitude to her teacher, Mrs. Jan. The school itself is wonderful, a true caring christan environment. It was so hard for me, after what happened at the last school, to trust sending her to another place. It's wierd though, so many people lead me to Carriage Hills, first our quilt guild president Theresa had sent her children there, and recommended it to me. Then another mom who had children there about 5 years ago told me her experience and how wonderful it was. I was still getting through all the emotions, especially the anger and hurt, from the first school. Then Evie's piano teacher, who goes to the church, sat with me and told her what she knew of the preschool.
Evie's piano teacher plays piano for the church, and for the preschool programs! She knows the teachers and director, and knowing what I had been through already, sat with me a while after a lesson and told me all she knew, then called the director and helped set me up with a meeting and to see the school. I was at the point where I knew Serena needed to be in preschool, but still didn't know where to trust. After meeting everyone there, it clicked where this was where God was leading us, this was where she needed to be.
Since she has started, she is a different girl! Her confidence is back, she is being responsible with her chores and helping around the house, she is excited to go to school.
The other bonus, and I am also greatful for, is that to help Serena get over the emotional abuse at the first preschool we had to stop attending church there. It was a Methodist Church, and since I am Orthodox and Kevin is Lutheran, it was a compromise. Since then, I have gotten Kevin to take us to the Greek Orthodox Church in Memphis. It does take us about a half hour to get there, but the drive is worth it. I feel soooo much better now we are able to take communion, and that Vasili will have a 40 day blessing after he is born. Kevin loves that the service is in English, so who knows, maybe I'll be able to get him to convert one of these days :)
Oh, and if you get a chance and have read this far, pick up a copy of Mark Lipinski's Christmas 365 with this cover
My yia's recipe for Koulourakia is on page 78, along with a really cute picture of the girls!!!
Happy Sewing, Happy Thanksgiving!
Sunday, November 7, 2010
Nap Mat
Sorry the pictures are aweful, but this weekend I wipped up a nap mat for Serena. She needs one for Kindergarten next year and her amazing new preschool has aftercare, which we are going to try out tomorrow so I can stay for the whole quilt guild meeting :) I haven't been to a guild meeting since August.
I found the tutorial for the nap mat on Jenny Garland's Blog. It's an easy sew. I did do velco instead of bottons though.
I found the tutorial for the nap mat on Jenny Garland's Blog. It's an easy sew. I did do velco instead of bottons though.
I like how it rolls up really easily. and she uses velco on one side so the mat comes out to clean, or if you decide to make 2 you don't have to rebuy the foam.
Serena looooves it. I used fleece instead of minky, because it was on sale :)
We're happy with how it turned out, It only took about 2 hours from start to finish if that. My dad is visiting from PA, and then my aunt and uncle came out from Arkansas, and with soccer on Saturday morning I literally had a short window of time to get it together!
Monday, November 1, 2010
Happy Halloween!
Serena wanted to be a Train Engineer
I made the trick or treat bags for them, half yard of fabric, french seamed like a pillowcase, then hemmed and handles added! So easy!
Evie spent a lot of time designing her costume and picking out the fabric. She is Thunder Girl! Superhero who can control Thunder and Lightning to fight crime. Her civilian name is Evie Evanson, an art and math teacher by day and crime fighter by night!
She was totally in love with her costume. It didn't take too long to make, but I hate working with Lame!
In other news, Rena's new preschool is awesome! Through Evie's piano teacher, we found Carriage Hills Baptist Preschool, which it the next town over, but really worth the drive! She has had no issues at all. Her teacher Mrs. Jan has almost 20 years experience teaching and is really sweet. She loves school again.
Now that Halloween is over, back to sewing baby things!
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
The next step..
I am still angry at myself. Angry that I trusted my youngest in the care of the preschool she was in. I need to work through my feelings, but every session with a psychologist, more and more comes out about how incompetently everything was handled. So if you read this, take from my experience and if you see any of these signs in a preschool, RUN. Find another placement as soon as possible.
I am not saying my child is easy. She is my tough one. She is clever but emotional. She in strong willed and very active. If she can control a situation, she will. Her behaviors were not appropriate, but should have been easily controlled.
Every Preschool should have a behavior plan. It should lay out what the steps are for unwanted behaviors. For example, hitting or biting the first time will be a time out, second a time out and all home, third a suspention. This lets parents know there is a clear policy. If not, it is at the whim of the director on who will be worked with and who will be dismissed outright. It also gives teachers a tool on how to redirect negative behaviors and correct the situation. Some teachers, especially in a state where you do not need more than a high school education to work in a preschool classroom, do not have the tools in their toolbox to work with all children. A competent director should be able to help them find the tools they need.
Never, ever, ever let a teacher or director try to hand you a diagnosis. If anything like Aspergers, Autsim, etc comes out of their mouths to describe your child, know that what they are doing is unethical, and if in a public school it is illegal. If they do push testing on you, tell them nicely that you need them, as a professional, to observe your child in the classroom and fill out a Connor or Brief-P. If they say they are unwilling or do not have the time, they are unwilling to do their job. Well, I am hoping that what happened to us was because the director was lazy. Anyway, no one is qualified to diagnosis your child who is not a psychologist. Some people will attend a seminar and automatically start taking it upon themselves to start labeling people. You know your child better than anyone else. Instead of trying to figure out what the catalyst of the behaviors were, I was told I needed to start testing for Serena THE FIRST WEEK OF SCHOOL. I made a behavior analysis for them to use in the classroom, because as a teacher I was taught that everything needs to be documented, and you, as the adult, can modify and control the behavior if you understand what the catalyst is. If you do not get to the base of a problematic behavior, it will get worse. Our job as adults is to guide children, at home and in the classroom. Not all kids are easy. If you don't feel up to the job, maybe you are in the wrong profession. Trust me, I was a teacher, I know that you sometimes get really difficult kids. Sometimes it is hard to find out what is the catalyst for a behavior, but hey, that's part of teaching.
When the teachers went to the director for help, she, as the educated professional in the building, should have been able to guide them.
If your child does not like going to school, try to find out why. For us, we found out that Serena felt her teachers hated her. She overheard the director and a teacher discussing her (yup, how professional is that, talking about a child in front of that child) sometime in the first 2 weeks of school. This and the reactions to her behaviors led to a lot of frustration, and she took that frustration out in the classroom. This explains why her behaviors were limited to that environment. Children need an environment where they not only feel safe, but also liked as a person. At 4, what would you do if you felt the adults hated you as a person?
Also, make sure the staff is willing to put things in writing. In a public school,we have to document everything. It makes it easier for everyone involved.
Now we are dealing with other moms, who I really don't know but went to the school, asking about Rena because the director told them what happened. It sucks having to explain yes, we were expelled but no, Serena does not have any of the issues she is telling people she has. This is the most unprofessional aspect of the whole situation.
We were there this year for barely 5 weeks. 5 weeks. That amazes me. To help us all heal, we also left the church. I don't care if it is almost an hour drive, we are now attending the nearest Orthodox Church. I am Orthodox, the girls are Orthodox. My husband is Lutheran, and we thouht the church was a nice compromise. But I can not keep going into that building. The pastor, who was at the meeting and knew we were hurt, never bothered to call or ask if we were OK after the fact. The expultion meeting was unnessasary anyway. If the director was competent, she would have had a behavior plan. Barring that, she could have written us a letter, handed it to me that day and not involved the pastor. In the meeting, she said she talked to "professionals" who told her she was not equipped to handle a special needs child like Serena. She was the one who decided to diagnosis Serena as special needs. We had barely started testing when she threw her out.
“If a man has a hundred sheep and one of them has gone astray, does he not leave the ninety-nine on the mountains and go in search of the one that went astray? And if he finds it, truly, I say to you, he rejoices over it more than over the ninety-nine that never went astray. So it is not the will of my Father who is in heaven that one of these little ones should perish.”
It feels like in the case though, the sheppardess decided to kick the sheep over the cliff to lighten her own load because it was the easiest way to deal with a situation from her perspective.
I am not saying my child is easy. She is my tough one. She is clever but emotional. She in strong willed and very active. If she can control a situation, she will. Her behaviors were not appropriate, but should have been easily controlled.
Every Preschool should have a behavior plan. It should lay out what the steps are for unwanted behaviors. For example, hitting or biting the first time will be a time out, second a time out and all home, third a suspention. This lets parents know there is a clear policy. If not, it is at the whim of the director on who will be worked with and who will be dismissed outright. It also gives teachers a tool on how to redirect negative behaviors and correct the situation. Some teachers, especially in a state where you do not need more than a high school education to work in a preschool classroom, do not have the tools in their toolbox to work with all children. A competent director should be able to help them find the tools they need.
Never, ever, ever let a teacher or director try to hand you a diagnosis. If anything like Aspergers, Autsim, etc comes out of their mouths to describe your child, know that what they are doing is unethical, and if in a public school it is illegal. If they do push testing on you, tell them nicely that you need them, as a professional, to observe your child in the classroom and fill out a Connor or Brief-P. If they say they are unwilling or do not have the time, they are unwilling to do their job. Well, I am hoping that what happened to us was because the director was lazy. Anyway, no one is qualified to diagnosis your child who is not a psychologist. Some people will attend a seminar and automatically start taking it upon themselves to start labeling people. You know your child better than anyone else. Instead of trying to figure out what the catalyst of the behaviors were, I was told I needed to start testing for Serena THE FIRST WEEK OF SCHOOL. I made a behavior analysis for them to use in the classroom, because as a teacher I was taught that everything needs to be documented, and you, as the adult, can modify and control the behavior if you understand what the catalyst is. If you do not get to the base of a problematic behavior, it will get worse. Our job as adults is to guide children, at home and in the classroom. Not all kids are easy. If you don't feel up to the job, maybe you are in the wrong profession. Trust me, I was a teacher, I know that you sometimes get really difficult kids. Sometimes it is hard to find out what is the catalyst for a behavior, but hey, that's part of teaching.
When the teachers went to the director for help, she, as the educated professional in the building, should have been able to guide them.
If your child does not like going to school, try to find out why. For us, we found out that Serena felt her teachers hated her. She overheard the director and a teacher discussing her (yup, how professional is that, talking about a child in front of that child) sometime in the first 2 weeks of school. This and the reactions to her behaviors led to a lot of frustration, and she took that frustration out in the classroom. This explains why her behaviors were limited to that environment. Children need an environment where they not only feel safe, but also liked as a person. At 4, what would you do if you felt the adults hated you as a person?
Also, make sure the staff is willing to put things in writing. In a public school,we have to document everything. It makes it easier for everyone involved.
Now we are dealing with other moms, who I really don't know but went to the school, asking about Rena because the director told them what happened. It sucks having to explain yes, we were expelled but no, Serena does not have any of the issues she is telling people she has. This is the most unprofessional aspect of the whole situation.
We were there this year for barely 5 weeks. 5 weeks. That amazes me. To help us all heal, we also left the church. I don't care if it is almost an hour drive, we are now attending the nearest Orthodox Church. I am Orthodox, the girls are Orthodox. My husband is Lutheran, and we thouht the church was a nice compromise. But I can not keep going into that building. The pastor, who was at the meeting and knew we were hurt, never bothered to call or ask if we were OK after the fact. The expultion meeting was unnessasary anyway. If the director was competent, she would have had a behavior plan. Barring that, she could have written us a letter, handed it to me that day and not involved the pastor. In the meeting, she said she talked to "professionals" who told her she was not equipped to handle a special needs child like Serena. She was the one who decided to diagnosis Serena as special needs. We had barely started testing when she threw her out.
Unfortunately, doing what is right is not always what is easy, and when you work with children, especially young children, the damage done can have a lifelong effect on that youth. A good preschool is willing to work with parents. A good preschool has a plan in place that outlines for parents what will happen when there are behavior issues. A good preschool keeps high ethical standards. A competent director can guide their staff to handle most any situation. A competent director does not recommend testing for children without thorough observation. A competent director keeps good paperwork. A competent director can handle situations within the preschool.
As a teacher, I kept Matthew 18:12-14 in mind.
“If a man has a hundred sheep and one of them has gone astray, does he not leave the ninety-nine on the mountains and go in search of the one that went astray? And if he finds it, truly, I say to you, he rejoices over it more than over the ninety-nine that never went astray. So it is not the will of my Father who is in heaven that one of these little ones should perish.”
It feels like in the case though, the sheppardess decided to kick the sheep over the cliff to lighten her own load because it was the easiest way to deal with a situation from her perspective.
Thursday, October 7, 2010
The flowers diatribe
Yesterday was my nine year wedding anniversary. Nine years ago, I married an engineer. Actually, his degree is in Engineering and Science. He enjoyed academic torture so much, he attainted his PhD in a field called Polymer Science and Engineering. He is both an engineer and a scientist. I am making this a big point to try to preface that while others like to laugh along to the show Big Bang Theory, I am married to it. I am not complaining, I would not change my life for anything, I love my husband. He is cute, smart, a great dad, and an all around great guy. But yes, I find humor in some of the things that come with the territory of being married to, as his sister calls him, Dr. Dork.
The first is offspring. Both girls take more after Kevin than me intellectually. This summer when looking at camps I tried to get Evie to consider the really cool art camps in the area. For her age they had ceramics, painting, gardening, you name it. REALLY COOL camps. What did she chose? Math Camp. My 6 year old went to Math Camp. On her own choice. She also likes to watch Star Trek with Daddy. Any one will do, but she loves TNG with Wesley Crusher. She wants to grow up to be a Communications Officer with Star Fleet. Not joking here. At 6 I wanted to be a princess. Serena was kicked out of preschool, because she was able to outsmart and control 3 adults. I have to find humor in that now, after spending hours with psychologist and specialist because the preschool director told us that there had to be something wrong with a 4 year old because they were incompetent at classroom management.
Yesterday being my anniversary, I got my favorite Sheldon-esq diatribe. The Flowers Diatribe. For this rant, he was labeled temporary king of geeks. Other men have tried the Flowers Diatribe with their significant others. Most get smacked for it.
See, the Geek types have a different view of romance than the rest of the world. Where most people think romance is like movies, where a woman is wined and dined and jewelry and flowers are appropriate gifts, Geeks see things way different. Why go out when you have the Babylon 5 box set and Chinese takeout? Cuddling on the couch with sci fi is way more romantic than having to get dressed up in uncomfortable clothes, driving to some restaurant just to pay $200 for a meal? Chinese take out for 2 is under $20. That leaves $180 for either more sci fi DVDs or electronics. To a geek, romance is making sure your house has a kick butt wi fi connection and your audio system is the best on the block. They could care less about jewels. A new Ipad is a much more romantic gift in their eyes.
Flowers, well, that is a whole big story. It started when we were dating, and I love The Flowers Diatribe, so every time a special occasion comes along where non-geek male spouses would present their signifigant others with flowers, I like to bring up the idea of flowers as appropriate gifts just to hear it. Since he is on a business trip, I totally brought it up.
“Hey, Kev, Happy Anniversary!”
“Oh, yeah, it is the 6th. Happy Anniversary.”
“So, do you want to go out when we get home, I can get a babysitter?”
“Naw, that’s OK. If you want we can wait till the girls are in bed and order take out and maybe watch a few DVDs….”
“So, do I need to be home this afternoon for any deliveries?”
“Like what, did you order anything?”
“No, I was wondering if I was getting flowers for our anniversary!”
THE FLOWERS DIATRIBE
“Flowers? No, I don’t think flowers are an appropriate way to show love and affection. Think about it, I mean really. You take growing, living flowers, kill them, present them to someone. It’s saying “Hey, I like you so much I am going to give you these dead, rotting things in a pretty glass container to remind you that life is fleeting and you are fading just like the dead rotting plants I present to you!” That does not say love. Flowers are a horrible idea for a gift. Plus there is no skill in decapiting flowers. It would be more a show of manhood if I went out and killed an animal or two to lovingly provide nourishment or show strength by beheading a few enemies and presenting their heads on sticks as trophies. Those feats show affection and love, not the rotting flesh of flowers.”
It does change a little each time. Sometimes he’ll just look at me because he knows I get a kick out of his rants and he doesn’t fall for it. Sometimes he goes for the history of flowers as gifts because hygiene was sub par. I love when he does that. Esp when he adds “so if I gave you flowers, it was if I was saying you smell so bad you need to cover it up”.
The first is offspring. Both girls take more after Kevin than me intellectually. This summer when looking at camps I tried to get Evie to consider the really cool art camps in the area. For her age they had ceramics, painting, gardening, you name it. REALLY COOL camps. What did she chose? Math Camp. My 6 year old went to Math Camp. On her own choice. She also likes to watch Star Trek with Daddy. Any one will do, but she loves TNG with Wesley Crusher. She wants to grow up to be a Communications Officer with Star Fleet. Not joking here. At 6 I wanted to be a princess. Serena was kicked out of preschool, because she was able to outsmart and control 3 adults. I have to find humor in that now, after spending hours with psychologist and specialist because the preschool director told us that there had to be something wrong with a 4 year old because they were incompetent at classroom management.
Yesterday being my anniversary, I got my favorite Sheldon-esq diatribe. The Flowers Diatribe. For this rant, he was labeled temporary king of geeks. Other men have tried the Flowers Diatribe with their significant others. Most get smacked for it.
See, the Geek types have a different view of romance than the rest of the world. Where most people think romance is like movies, where a woman is wined and dined and jewelry and flowers are appropriate gifts, Geeks see things way different. Why go out when you have the Babylon 5 box set and Chinese takeout? Cuddling on the couch with sci fi is way more romantic than having to get dressed up in uncomfortable clothes, driving to some restaurant just to pay $200 for a meal? Chinese take out for 2 is under $20. That leaves $180 for either more sci fi DVDs or electronics. To a geek, romance is making sure your house has a kick butt wi fi connection and your audio system is the best on the block. They could care less about jewels. A new Ipad is a much more romantic gift in their eyes.
Flowers, well, that is a whole big story. It started when we were dating, and I love The Flowers Diatribe, so every time a special occasion comes along where non-geek male spouses would present their signifigant others with flowers, I like to bring up the idea of flowers as appropriate gifts just to hear it. Since he is on a business trip, I totally brought it up.
“Hey, Kev, Happy Anniversary!”
“Oh, yeah, it is the 6th. Happy Anniversary.”
“So, do you want to go out when we get home, I can get a babysitter?”
“Naw, that’s OK. If you want we can wait till the girls are in bed and order take out and maybe watch a few DVDs….”
“So, do I need to be home this afternoon for any deliveries?”
“Like what, did you order anything?”
“No, I was wondering if I was getting flowers for our anniversary!”
THE FLOWERS DIATRIBE
“Flowers? No, I don’t think flowers are an appropriate way to show love and affection. Think about it, I mean really. You take growing, living flowers, kill them, present them to someone. It’s saying “Hey, I like you so much I am going to give you these dead, rotting things in a pretty glass container to remind you that life is fleeting and you are fading just like the dead rotting plants I present to you!” That does not say love. Flowers are a horrible idea for a gift. Plus there is no skill in decapiting flowers. It would be more a show of manhood if I went out and killed an animal or two to lovingly provide nourishment or show strength by beheading a few enemies and presenting their heads on sticks as trophies. Those feats show affection and love, not the rotting flesh of flowers.”
It does change a little each time. Sometimes he’ll just look at me because he knows I get a kick out of his rants and he doesn’t fall for it. Sometimes he goes for the history of flowers as gifts because hygiene was sub par. I love when he does that. Esp when he adds “so if I gave you flowers, it was if I was saying you smell so bad you need to cover it up”.
Friday, October 1, 2010
sufjan stevens sewing day
I am trying to get a few projects ready to sew. We found out on this week that we are having a BOY! The girls are so excited, Evie because a brother won't bother her barbies and Serena because she can teach him how to play cars and soccer. After two girls though, all of our baby stuff is pink and purple! I don't even have a white onsie on hand.
I have Sufjan Stevens playing, I love listening to him. But my thoughts today for some reason are lead through how we relate to others. How sometimes we hurt others and do not even know it until much later, because it was something small we didn't realize we did. As opposed to how some people hurt others intentionally. I think it is easier to ask forgiveness for things we did not do on purpose, because we genuinely feel remorse after realizing we have done harm, where as those that harm intentionally have no remorse.
I think part of this is I am still trying to decide how I feel about how Serena was treated by the director of the preschool. Was it intentional? I know that it was not considered what was best for the child in this situation, but what was easiest for the adults involved. Which is why part of me hopes that is was pure laziness on her part she decided to act like that. But then I realize that she often pushes parents into testing their children for special needs. That part to me is intentionally malicious and unethical. Luckily Serena is over the fact that she heard the director and a teacher discussing her negatively. I wonder if the way she was treated by the adults was what triggered her behaviors in that classroom, since that is the only place where they happened?
I have Sufjan Stevens playing, I love listening to him. But my thoughts today for some reason are lead through how we relate to others. How sometimes we hurt others and do not even know it until much later, because it was something small we didn't realize we did. As opposed to how some people hurt others intentionally. I think it is easier to ask forgiveness for things we did not do on purpose, because we genuinely feel remorse after realizing we have done harm, where as those that harm intentionally have no remorse.
I think part of this is I am still trying to decide how I feel about how Serena was treated by the director of the preschool. Was it intentional? I know that it was not considered what was best for the child in this situation, but what was easiest for the adults involved. Which is why part of me hopes that is was pure laziness on her part she decided to act like that. But then I realize that she often pushes parents into testing their children for special needs. That part to me is intentionally malicious and unethical. Luckily Serena is over the fact that she heard the director and a teacher discussing her negatively. I wonder if the way she was treated by the adults was what triggered her behaviors in that classroom, since that is the only place where they happened?
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